Enduring the uncomfortable middle where growth actually happens.

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Have you ever wondered what really makes you feel satisfied in the work you do?

Lets say you are a data analyst. At what point do you consider that the dashboard you have created is a job well done?

Not the satisfaction that you have completed a task that your manager has given to you, but the feeling of pride you get looking at the output you have created.

Or if you are an architect, would you be satisfied with every design you draw or are there certain projects where you think you have come up with your best piece of work yet?

This is where taste comes to the picture.

That feeling of pride often comes from how your taste judges your work - what you personally deem as “good.”

The feeling of “not good enough” in your work comes because you have a good taste.

What I have come to realize over the past few months of writing is the journey towards reaching that taste.

American author Ira Glass calls this “The Gap”.

In the Gap, you have two options - either you decide you are not good enough and quit, or just keep your head down and work until you reach your taste.

Most people take the former option.

It is very easy to quit but hard to endure.

But this phase is normal and it sows seeds of doubt even to the best.

Mari Selvaraj is probably the most coveted director in Tamil Cinema at the moment.

But on his directorial debut Pariyerum Perumal, his whole crew doubted him as a director during the first few days.

There were comments made that he has no clue how to direct a movie, does not know the filming process, shot order, angles etc.

This reached Mari’s ears and he felt dejected. True to them, he was unsure of some of the technical terms mentioned by the crew and he doubted himself as a director.

He sought the counsel of his mentor Director Ram with doubts on himself and if he should even continue work on the movie or give up.

Ram didn’t give him technical advice.

Ram asks Mari, “Are you picturing something you haven’t seen? Every frame that you take is based on your lived experience right? Do not worry. Just finish the movie and we will see how it pans out”

And that reassurance from his mentor is what has gone on to produce 5 classic movies of modern Tamil cinema.

What he felt during the initial days and what his crew felt was the Gap. The crew did not know Mari’s taste since this was his directorial debut. And Mari did not realise until that point that crossing the Gap chasm is the only way to reach his taste.

Every man who wants to grow a full length beard needs to go through the few days of messy uneven stub. Some can’t bear the embarrassment and quickly shave it off. But those who understand that is part of the process, shrug it off.

Every creator, professional, or dreamer faces their own version of the uneven beard.

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I hope you enjoyed this week's version. See you next week.

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Best wishes,

Nimalan.